Eight Ways
by DaniiButNotBeck
Summary: Eight ways in which Alex tells Olivia she loves her. Based on "8 Ways to Say 'I Love You'" by R. McKinley


Title: 8 Ways

Pairing: Alex Cabot/Olivia Benson

Rating: K+ (Way 2 might be T. I don't know; I'm bad at rating.)

Author's Note: These characters aren't mine. If they were, things would be different, and I wouldn't have to worry about paying for college. They belong to Dick Wolf and NBC. Do I have that right? Anyways, the only things I own are almost a dozen textbooks, an empty box of old candy canes, and a laptop I got for my birthday.

Author's Note 2: This is based on "8 Ways to Say 'I Love You'" by R. McKinley

Author's Note 3: This entire story was written while listening to Sara Ramirez's cover of "The Story". It's such an amazing song. If you get a chance, I highly recommend listening to it. Also, Ways 1, 3, 4, 6, and 8 were inspired by it.

Enjoy!

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* * *

**Way One**

_Spit it into her voicemail, a little slurred and sounding like the shot whiskey you downed for courage. Feel as ashamed as you do walking into work in last night's clothes. Wake up cringing for days, waiting for her to mention it._

Knowing she'll regret it in the morning, Alex downs the shot in front of her and pulls her cellphone out of her purse. She dials Olivia's number quickly, knowing that if she doesn't, she'll back out…again.

The call goes straight to voicemail, and somewhere in the back of Alex's mind, she remembers Olivia saying she had to do an interrogation or something that night. "I love you, Olivia Benson," she says to the answering machine, her voice smooth and unable to hide the slight slur. She waits for a few seconds before hanging up the phone, unable to believe she just said that. She sets her phone on the table and orders another of whatever was in the glass in front of her.

She wakes up the next morning – equally ashamed and nauseous – to an incessant knocking on her apartment door. She gets out of bed slowly, careful not to provoke the already-growing headache she can feel in her eyes.

When she opens the door, she gasps and instantly flushes. Olivia stands in her doorway, smiling crookedly, her hands in the pockets of her black leather jacket.

"I got your message," Olivia says. "I figured you'd need some help today."

"I'm fine, Liv," Alex says, stepping aside to let Olivia into her apartment anyway.

Olivia closes the door behind her, and gently presses her lips to Alex's, catching Alex off-guard. "I love you too, Alex," she whispers.

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* * *

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**Way Two**

_Sigh it into her mouth, wedged in between teeth and tongues. Don't even let your lips move when you say it, ever so lightly, into the air. Maybe it was just an exhalation of ecstasy._

Olivia leans against Alex's solid oak apartment door, her hands hooked in Olivia's belt loops, pulling the blonde against her. Alex, unprepared for movement, stumbles into Olivia, her lips crashing unceremoniously against the detective's. Alex's hands instinctively grip Olivia's hips, pulling their bodies closer.

Alex sighs something that sounds suspiciously like "I love you" against Olivia's lips, and the sound makes Olivia pull away from the kiss and look into the attorney's eyes. Alex's face gives nothing away, but her eyes are a different story. Mixed with the obvious lust and arousal, Olivia is sure she sees something deeper. After a moment, Alex smiles coyly, giving Olivia the answer she needs.

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* * *

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**Way Three**

_Buy her flowers. Buy her chocolate. Buy her a teddy bear, because that's what every romantic comedy has taught you. Take her out to a nice restaurant where neither of you feel comfortable and spend the whole night clearing your throat and tugging at your tie. Feel like your actions are more suited to a proposal than the simple confession of something you've always known._

The ever-punctual Alex Cabot shows up at Olivia's apartment door at 6:15pm – a full fifteen minutes before she was due. A mix of pink, red, yellow, and violet tulips* in her hand, she takes a calming breath and knocks on the door.

Olivia answers the door all of thirty seconds later, dressed in a black dress Alex has never seen and still struggling to put her left earring in. "You're early," she says, running into the bathroom. "I'll be ready in a couple minutes."

"Okay," Alex says, smiling to herself. She leans against the apartment door, legs crossed at her ankles, and plays over her plan for the night in her mind.

"Ready?" Olivia asks, her voice pulling Alex out of her thoughts.

Alex blushes lights and hands the bouquet of tulips to Olivia. "For you," she says.

"They're beautiful," Olivia says, taking the flowers from Alex's outstretched hand and placing them in the vase by her sink.

"Like you," Alex says. Clearing her throat, she says, "Ready to go?"

Olivia nods. "Where are we going?" she asks, grabbing her purse off the counter and her jacket off the back of the chair.

Alex smiles mischievously. "You'll see when we get there."

The restaurant is high class, and although it's Alex's world, it's a place she would never step foot in unless she was looking to impress.

And impress she does.

Olivia looks around the restaurant – wide-eyed and entranced – and allows Alex to take her hand and lead her to a table at the back of the restaurant.

"Is it too much?" Alex asks, watching Olivia's face intently. "If it's too much, we can go somewhere else. I don't mind."

Olivia places her hand over Alex's reassuringly. "Relax," she says. "Take a deep breath." Alex does. She'd do anything Olivia said if Olivia would keep looking at her with those eyes. "This place is…It's something else, Alex."

Alex tries to smile, but Olivia's roundabout answer makes her more nervous than she'd ever admit. "I love you," she says quickly, looking across the table into Olivia's deep brown eyes.

Olivia smiles widely as Alex's blush grows deeper and deeper. "I love you too," she says.

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* * *

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**Way Four**

_Whisper it into her hair in the middle of the night, after you've counted the space between her breaths and are certain she's asleep. Shut your eyes quickly when she shifts toward you in askance. Maybe you were just sleep whispering._

Alex lies in bed silently, her body draped over Olivia's, counting the freckles adorning the detective's chest and shoulder. She listens to Olivia's slow, easy breathing, reveling in how relaxed she is, and counts the spaces between each breath. When she is sure Olivia is asleep, Alex kisses her neck and whispers "I love you" into her ear. She closes her eyes quickly as Olivia starts to move underneath her.

A lazy smile makes its way to Olivia's lips. Cracking one eye so she can watch Alex's reaction, Olivia whispers "I love you too" into the still night. Alex just smiles.

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* * *

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**Way Five**

_Blurt it out in the middle of an impromptu dance party in the kitchen, as clumsy as your two left feet. When time seems to freeze, hastily tack on "in that shirt" or "when you make your award-winning meatballs" or, if you are feeling particularly brave, "when we do this." Resume dancing and pretend you don't feel her eyes on you for the rest of the night._

Perched on the edge of Olivia's couch and sipping a glass of wine, Alex watches Olivia's hips gyrate to the music playing over the radio in the kitchen. Feeling the flush creep up her neck, she sets her wine glass on the coffee table and joins Olivia in the kitchen.

"It's not ready yet," Olivia says, feeling Alex standing behind her.

"How long?" Alex asks, resting her hands on Olivia's hips.

"Not too much long," Olivia says. "Maybe fifteen minutes.

"Dance with me."

Olivia laughs. "You can't dance."

"You can." Alex chuckles. "Dance with me."

Olivia spins around and takes Alex's hands in her own. "Like this?" she asks, spinning the blonde.

Alex laughs. "I love you," she blurts out, not realizing she said it out loud.

Olivia stops dancing, a smile creeping over her lips. "You do?"

Alex takes a deep breath. "I do."

"I love you too."

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* * *

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**Way Six**

_Write her a letter in which the amount of circumnavigating and angst could rival Mr. Darcy's. Debate where to leave it all day – on her pillow? In her coat pocket? Throw it away in frustration, conveniently leaving it face-up in the trashcan, her name scrawled on the front in your sloppy handwriting. Let her wonder if you mean it._

Striding into the squadroom, Alex clutches the envelope in her hand. Glancing at Olivia's desk and noticing it's unoccupied, she leaves the envelope perched against the detective's computer so her elegant handwriting is the first thing Olivia sees when she returns. She smiles to herself as she turns on her heel to leave the room, still feeling the little bits of anxiety gnawing at her. It had taken her the better part of the day to decide where to leave the envelope. At first, she had tried leaving it in Olivia's car, then she moved it to Olivia's locker, next she had tried leaving it in Olivia's purse. Finally she decided the desk would be the best place.

Moments after Alex leaves the room, Olivia comes back from lunch. Sitting at her desk, she notices the envelope and instantly recognizes Alex's handwriting. Smiling, she opens the envelope. Inside is a letter a mere four words long.

I love you.

-Alex.

The short letter makes Olivia's heart melt. Grabbing her jacket and the letter, she makes a mad dash for Alex's office.

Alex feels Olivia's presence before she hears her. "I take it you read my letter," she states.

"Not much of a letter," Olivia says, smiling crookedly.

"I suppose not."

"I love you too, Alex."

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* * *

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**Way Seven**

_Wait until something terrible has happened and you can't not tell her anymore. Wait until she almost gets hit by a car crossing Wabash and after you are done cursing at the cab drivers in this city, when you realize you are actually just terrified of living without her. Tell her with your hands shaking._

Everything happens so quickly. In less than a minute, Olivia goes from standing by the entrance of the café that Alex brings her to, waiting for Alex to arrive, to lying on the sidewalk, blood pooling out of a wound in her shoulder.

Alex fights her way through the mob surrounding the detective, screaming her name while trying to fish her cellphone out of her bag. She drops to her knees by Olivia's side and pushes the man that is there out of her way. She places her hand on the bullet wound in Olivia's shoulder, desperately trying to stop the bleeding.

Alex barely remembers anything leading up to Olivia waking up in the hospital. She knows there's a bullet wound in Olivia's shoulder and she knows they have to keep her for a couple days, but she can't say how or why any of this happened. What she does know is she is in love with Olivia and can't live without her.

Olivia opens her eyes when she hears a knock on her hospital room door. "Come in," she says, a smile in her voice. Alex walks over to Olivia's bed, her whole body trembling, and rests her hand on Olivia's foot. "I got shot, Alex," Olivia says.

"I know," Alex says, wiping furiously at her eyes.

"I got shot and all I could think was you didn't get to have your breakfast."

The tears fall fast and easy from Alex's eyes, leaving hot trails down her cheeks. "I love you so much, Olivia Benson," she says.

"You love me?"

Alex nods. "I do."

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* * *

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**Way Eight**

_Say it deliberately, your tongue a springboard for every syllable. Over coffee, brushing your teeth side-by-side, as you turn off the light to go to sleep – it doesn't matter where. Do not adorn it with extra words like "I think" or "I might." Do not sigh heavily as if admitting it were a burden instead of the most joyous thing you've ever done. Look her in the eyes and pray, heart thumping wildly, that she will turn to you and say, "I love you too."_

Olivia sits in a chair in front of Alex's desk, flipping through a case file. Feeling Alex's eyes on her, she sets the file on the desk and looks into Alex's eyes. "What?" she asks. "Do I have something on my face?"

Alex laughs and shakes her head. "No, you're…you're perfect."

Olivia blushes under Alex's intense gaze. "I am not."

"I love you," Alex says, her voice confident but her mind an anxious mess.

Olivia smiles lazily. "I love you too."


End file.
